


Things They Didn't Tell Jack O'Neill About the SGC

by busaikko



Category: Stargate Atlantis, Stargate SG-1
Genre: Arts, Auctions, Crack, Episode: s04e03 Reunion, Gen, Knitting, Money
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-10-14
Updated: 2007-10-14
Packaged: 2017-10-19 21:27:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/205383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/busaikko/pseuds/busaikko
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Crack eptag to Reunion.  Just why did Rodney want Ronon's painting?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Things They Didn't Tell Jack O'Neill About the SGC

Okay. Jack would have liked to know about the whole aliens trying to kill us shit before he left Normal for Weird Fucking Space. He'd really have liked to have back his firm belief in death after life, because he's seen far too much horror in the grey inbetween, people dying and then _coming back_ and then doing it _again_.

He'd really hoped to get through his life as a happy agnostic. Thanks to the SGC, he's met the gods, and they are real assholes.

But mostly it's the little things. The sand in the boots. The meals in plastic. The having to smile at people you don't trust. Having to shoot people -- well, bipeds, anyway.

And the salary, frankly, sucks. No one's making a profit off of saving the world. The SGC car park is full of beat-up junkers; he's heard that on Atlantis, John Sheppard's had to teach the Marines to knit -- first, because they went through socks like Wraith through a funfair, but then because they made quite a killing with their colourful hats and baby blankets at offworld bazaars.

But it was worse for the foreigners, especially those with expensive national healthcare schemes and generous pension plans and high rates of taxation. Apparently, it was possible for, say, a Canadian to live in Atlantis and go into debt just getting necessities brought over on the Daedalus.

Jack O'Neill looked at his computer, looked at his very nice blue ceiling, and looked back. Nope, the nifty Athosian _chirai_ wood carving of the Goddess Gbaan was still there, although there had been three more bids in the past minute, bringing the price up to 438 Canadian dollars. _Top secret alien artifacts!_ the page heading read.

Jack wanted to retire, get out of the game, but the mortgages on his cabin and house weren't going anywhere soon. He slowly backspaced through the damning message he'd started. He scrolled up, took a deep breath, and clicked.

He figured he could spend two weeks' worth of pizza money on bad art, especially since Rodney McKay (Canadian entrepeneur) looked so damn attractive immortalised in his Athosian bondage leathers.


End file.
